Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Non-sequitur of the day.

The Turner household has had a longstanding moratorium on Burger King (somewhat tyrannically imposed by one member who, she claims, "doesn't really care for their fries"), but this Turner has always thought of them as sensationalist marketing gone very right.  Their bits with a masked and footballing Burger King were the most forgivable of the endlessly-recycled commercials during the 2005-7 football seasons, and their recent "Whopper Virgins" campaign is pretty cute, I suppose.

Cute, did I say? I meant offensive.  People are creating a fuss over this apparently imperialistic/cruel/wasteful exercise, but the WTF-prize goes to Sharon Akabas, who, unsurprisingly, hails from Columbia University.

"It's outrageous," said Sharon Akabas of the Institute of Human Nutrition at Columbia University. "What's next? Are we going to start taking guns out to some of these remote places and ask them which one they like better?"

Ignore for a moment the typically offensive implication that these places are filled with noble savages, childlike innocents whose fall from grace can only begin with the introduction of guns by Westerners (a la Steinbeck's The Pearl), and just focus on that remarkable leap of association.  Yes, Akabas, Whoppers and guns are, despite some cosmetic differences, basically the same thing. 

See the rest of the articles for some equally (and, by even these standards, remarkably flimsy) arguments against the King's capitalistic plague, most of which amount to: how dare Burger King spend its money instead it to me?!?

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